With Thursday’s tryptophan infused frenzy starting to wear off I’m noticing a distinctly self-reflective bent to my thought process. After all the talk of thanking and giving it that it is my mind and not my stomach that is refusing to settle. “What am I striving for, and why? Are my aims altruistic or self serving?” And on and on and on.
A recent article in the most current issue of Outside Magazine posited that the marketing tactics used to sell soft drinks and toilet paper should be used to “sell” charities and causes. The reason? People want to feel good when they give. They want the warm-fuzzy feeling that comes from knowing that their $5 bought a book for the little girl with an exotic name. Donating that same $5 to fight something like “AIDS in Africa” doesn’t deliver the same emotional bang for the buck. The AIDS crisis is too big, too difficult, and too mired in dry statistics for most people to really get excited about. While the real need is unquestionably greater, the perceived impact that one person can have is diminished.
That brings me back to me. I’m confident that I really do want to “help people”. But, my own experience with clients tells me that the “lost cause” is much harder to get behind than the “success story”. In such situations I am usually quick to say “I can’t help someone who isn’t will to help themselves”, but I think that is only half of it. The other part of it is “I can only help someone who is helping me.”
I imagine that many people find themselves in situations where they are called to give, of money, time, or themselves, and they subconsciously weigh their emotional balance sheet. With the ideal of “giving freely” and selflessly at stake, it might be uncomfortable to consider selfish giving as the rule rather than the exception, but perhaps it’s a more honest, and not necessarily a wrong, position.
Perhaps in recognizing our deep seated motivations we can more effectively harness our own desire to do good and to feel good about it. Besides, who can argue against feeling like you are making a difference; that you are, in some small way, bringing about change in the world? When looking at a situation that seems utterly bleak and hopeless, zero in on something that is that is tangible and achievable to you. When you’ve successfully done your part, look for the next opportunity, and the next.
You’ll be more willing to make a dent in some of the world’s big problems when you can see your initials in the mark.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Monday, November 23, 2009
Step away from the hamster wheel
Have you ever tried to lose weight or get in shape? You probably started out by purchasing a new piece of exercise equipment or picking up a copy of the latest “revolutionary” book promising “a new you in 30 days or less”. Next question, are you still trying?
Consider for a moment the fact that the “fitness industry” is based on people trying without ever actually succeeding. If people actually did reach their goals, there would be no “next big thing” and the endless parade of products and promises would have no audience. The marketing of fitness products is ironically no different than that of fast food. No one is really asking for a five-patty hamburger or an “ab lounge”. What people want is the emotion that is being sold.
By selling “manliness” or “attractiveness” companies can generate huge profits while selling inferior products. Whether it is “cheap” plastic or “cheap” meat is immaterial to the corporate shills that see only dollar signs. The cost to our environment, our health, and our future as a species is brushed under the rug as long as the stockholders are happy and expectations for this quarter are met.
The good news is that this system is as solid as a house of cards. By spending some time away from the incessant barrage of messaging and media you give yourself the space to discover what you truly need. Go for a walk in a park or in the woods, play with your kids, or meditate on the silence within. You don’t need any more than what you already have, you might even need less.
And, you might even find that you stop trying and start doing.
Consider for a moment the fact that the “fitness industry” is based on people trying without ever actually succeeding. If people actually did reach their goals, there would be no “next big thing” and the endless parade of products and promises would have no audience. The marketing of fitness products is ironically no different than that of fast food. No one is really asking for a five-patty hamburger or an “ab lounge”. What people want is the emotion that is being sold.
By selling “manliness” or “attractiveness” companies can generate huge profits while selling inferior products. Whether it is “cheap” plastic or “cheap” meat is immaterial to the corporate shills that see only dollar signs. The cost to our environment, our health, and our future as a species is brushed under the rug as long as the stockholders are happy and expectations for this quarter are met.
The good news is that this system is as solid as a house of cards. By spending some time away from the incessant barrage of messaging and media you give yourself the space to discover what you truly need. Go for a walk in a park or in the woods, play with your kids, or meditate on the silence within. You don’t need any more than what you already have, you might even need less.
And, you might even find that you stop trying and start doing.
Friday, November 6, 2009
the swiftness
Errands to run, forget the car! No time to waste; grab wallet, and get…bike…out...the… door. Watch out lizards!
Super Walmart in my sights; can’t believe they sold me this junk. Cheap ain’t cheap when it’s costs so much.
Hit the intersection, hit the button, hit the button, hit the button. Hit and run, not today. Watch out buddy, respect the right of way.
Busting turns, jumping curbs, who wants to drive? Besides, wilderness resides in retention ponds and this old Mc Donald’s never seen a farm. Meanwhile Wal-mart rises up, a cathedral of consumption. The smell, it saturates everything, but the savings, the savings! Everyday their managers are raving about customers and associates complaining.
Escape the asphalt asylum and get back to grey skies and a cool breeze. Pedal as fast as I can and coast through the urban jungle. Summer’s dead and gone; hear fall’s death knell ringing? The underbrush is going brown, bougainvillea with jaundiced leaves line the street and only the golf course is green.
Today I’m freer on two wheels than four and the rules are out the window. Liberally going against the grain, riding against traffic, reckless and half-ecstatic a light pack bouncing against my back. But isn’t it ironic? The Sport’s Authority lacks a rack! “Hey man, do you mind if park this baby inside?”
I’m on the road trading exhaustion for exhilaration, surrendering to the speed, careening down the street, and loving every minute. As soon as the burn hits your legs, it hurts so well. Why not feel real?
Walgreens says halt, but half-off Halloween candy can’t stop this train. Can’t say the same about 24 ounces of energy, and only $2.99!
Look at the little people in little boxes, warped metal and mental. Maybe they’re asleep at the wheel?
Hurry to the homely homestead up ahead. A final push and down to earth, but not for long.
Bike + errands = adventure
Super Walmart in my sights; can’t believe they sold me this junk. Cheap ain’t cheap when it’s costs so much.
Hit the intersection, hit the button, hit the button, hit the button. Hit and run, not today. Watch out buddy, respect the right of way.
Busting turns, jumping curbs, who wants to drive? Besides, wilderness resides in retention ponds and this old Mc Donald’s never seen a farm. Meanwhile Wal-mart rises up, a cathedral of consumption. The smell, it saturates everything, but the savings, the savings! Everyday their managers are raving about customers and associates complaining.
Escape the asphalt asylum and get back to grey skies and a cool breeze. Pedal as fast as I can and coast through the urban jungle. Summer’s dead and gone; hear fall’s death knell ringing? The underbrush is going brown, bougainvillea with jaundiced leaves line the street and only the golf course is green.
Today I’m freer on two wheels than four and the rules are out the window. Liberally going against the grain, riding against traffic, reckless and half-ecstatic a light pack bouncing against my back. But isn’t it ironic? The Sport’s Authority lacks a rack! “Hey man, do you mind if park this baby inside?”
I’m on the road trading exhaustion for exhilaration, surrendering to the speed, careening down the street, and loving every minute. As soon as the burn hits your legs, it hurts so well. Why not feel real?
Walgreens says halt, but half-off Halloween candy can’t stop this train. Can’t say the same about 24 ounces of energy, and only $2.99!
Look at the little people in little boxes, warped metal and mental. Maybe they’re asleep at the wheel?
Hurry to the homely homestead up ahead. A final push and down to earth, but not for long.
Bike + errands = adventure
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